3 Days, 3 Quotes Challenge, Day 3

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Thank you Kat at Familyfurore.com for tagging me in this challenge. I have had so much fun with it! Sadly it is my third and final day. 😦

I love quotes and they have helped inspire and motivate me through some tough times. There are two quotes I used to read daily through especially difficult times. I can’t decide which one to share, so I am going to share them both. I hope that isn’t cheating; but, I just can’t separate them! 😉

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This quote says it all. When you are going through the darkest moments of your life, all you can do is just keep going. One foot in front of the other and soon you will move right through it!

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I absolutely love this quote. At the end of the day, when you are feeling broken and you can’t imagine how you can keep going, you really can hear the faint whisper of hope, encouraging you to keep trying.

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Well, that’s all folks! I sincerely hope you have enjoyed these quotes. ❤

Today’s three nominations are:

michaelwatsonvt.wordpress.com

teleportingweena.wordpress.com

randomsbyarandom.wordpress.com

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3 Days, 3 Quotes Challenge, Day 2

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Today is the second day of the 3 day/3 quote challenge. Thanks again to Kat at Familyfurore.com for tagging me.

I hope you enjoyed yesterday’s quote. Today’s is another favorite!

How exciting is it to imagine you can be whoever you choose!?

This quote helped me realize that all the horrible things that have happened to me don’t have to shape who I am. I have learned to let them be in the past, look to the future with optimism and love who I am in the present.

Today the three bloggers I nominate for this challenge are:

leennascreativebox.wordpress.com

visionariekindness.com

kustomkarl67.wordpress.com

Hope you have fun with it! 🙂

 

3 Days, 3 Quotes Challenge, Day 1

3 day 3 quote

Much gratitude to Kat of Familyfurore.com for tagging me in this challenge, to post 3 quotes for 3 consecutive days and tag 3 bloggers each day.

I am a big fan of quotes and turn to them many times to renew my faith and inspiration.

I hope these posts will bring a smile 🙂

baby step quote

This quote supports my ‘baby step’ philosophy. If you can just do the few things that are necessary each day, then eventually you will find yourself able to do more, even what you previously thought was impossible! ❤

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Today I tag the following bloggers, have fun!

spiritualdragonfly.wordpress.com

therabbitholez.wordpress.com

itsgoodtobecrazysometimes.wordpress.com

 

My Herbal School Books

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Happy Spring Everyone! The Advanced Herbalism course just started at my school. Unfortunately, I will not be able to take it; because, I have to save money for a car. Maybe, it is just as well. I really want to review all of my herbal apprenticeship studies, because it was a lot of information to take in, and I really want to retain it. I thought I would share a bit of it here with you all, starting with my school books.

I thought this was a great collection of books and diverse as well.

Beginning from left bottom; the Peterson Field Guide to Medicinal Plants and Herbs of Eastern and Central North AmericaThird Edition. By Steven Foster&James A. Duke 

This book is an invaluable guide! This is what we used to find our plant samples in the wild for our materia medica pressings. It includes the common and medical name of each plant, along with pictures, great descriptions, where it is found and uses, that include historical and indigenous practices. This book became my ‘herbalist bible’, helping me find over 100 plants!peppermint

The next book (top left) is Heal Your Body, The Mental Causes For Physical Illness and The Metaphysical Way to Overcome Them, and it’s by Louise Hay 

You may remember I discovered her when I was healing with hay house.  If you’ve never heard about her or her healing crusades in the 70’s, then you really should check her out. This book explains that there are mental causes for each of our physical ailments and includes affirmations for each body part! I used this book to heal my lower back spasms during my course. I will write about that in a different post. I still use this book daily for affirmations that correspond to whatever part of my body is acting up. A must have book for anyone on a healing journey. hay

The book on the top middle is Edible Wild Plants, Eastern/Central North America, by Lee Allen Peterson.

This is another must have guide for herablists and wildcrafters. I am not as familiar with this one; but, it has all the same great info as the Peterson’s guide.ewp2ewp

 

Top right hand corner is The Herbal Handbook, A User’s Guide to Medical Herbalism, by David Hoffmann.

This book is awesome! I used it a lot during homework assignments for our materia medica; because it was set up similarly. It describes Actions and Body Systems and the herbs recommended for each. It doesn’t go too in depth with the plants; but it’s a great quick guide, and a must for learning materia medica. herbal handbook

Next book, bottom right, The Herb Book, (The Most Complete Catalog of Herbs Ever Published) by John Lust, with over 275 Line drawings.

This book I have not familiarized myself with much yet either. I used it some toward the end of my course for homework. I guess I was a little intimidated by it and stuck to the other books; but, it looks intense and I will definitely be studying it while I am reviewing everything.the herb bookthe herb book2

Last but definitely not least, Body Into Balance, An Herbal Guide to Holistic Self-Care, by Maria Noel Groves.

This is a great integral component. Holistic Care aims to treat the complete person, physically, psychologically, socially, and spiritually, in the management and prevention of disease.  I didn’t start reading it until my course ended; but it ties in all we have learned. It’s divided into three parts, foundations of good health, going deeper and tying it together, and then buying and making herbal remedies. This book is done beautifully and another essential tool for healing.bodybalance3

 

 

 

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I hope you have enjoyed viewing these books, I know I have. I will insert links to them through their titles if you are interested in purchasing them. I am going to love reviewing all the magical plants, even though they are all covered with snow presently; soon, they will be emerging and I look forward to more of their stories. 🙂

 

 

Being Poor

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In a world where we are all fighting to be equal and trying to be heard and validated, it surprises me that there isn’t more emphasis on the socioeconomic crisis. I often imagine how a rich person and a poor person have two completely different life experiences and often never knowing what the other has to offer. It is a very real struggle and painful feeling of segregation, being poor.

Being poor fills you with shame and lack of self worth. Others look down on you, think you are lazy and worthless. You’re angry because no matter how much you try you will never be good enough, or have enough. You will always struggle. That’s just the way it is.

My mama used to say, “The rich get richer and the poor get poorer.”

I’ve been poor most of my life. I was eight years old when my parents were divorced. Divorce was shamed back then and I was an outcast because of it; but, even more so because I was poor. Even in church people moved away from us and gave us looks of pity. My mom went from not being allowed to have a job to working three of them to raise us kids. Every now and then she would quit working to get assistance for our dental and medical needs, and then she would go right back to busting her ass. I was so proud of her; but, we suffered without her presence. No matter how hard she worked, we still grew up in a neighborhood of poverty. Standing in lines for large government blocks of cheese and a warm bowl of soup.

My mom insisted on paying for me to got to a catholic junior high school, because the public one was pretty dangerous. There were stories of young girls getting raped, drugs and bad teachers. Unfortunately, little did she know, she couldn’t prevent any of these from my future. Regardless, she scraped up everything she had and there I was in the middle of a rich catholic school with my two pairs of pants, holes in my shoes and too much makeup. I was constantly made fun of and discriminated against. I eventually stopped going. In 8th grade I attended only 20 days of school and made up the rest from home. Thankfully, it was allowed back then. I don’t think the school wanted me there anyway.

Being poor drove me to steal. Not just for me but for others in my neighborhood. I felt like Robin Hood. I wanted to save everyone. I took in stray kids and cats. A group of us would steal food stamps from mailboxes and buy for everyone. Together we would survive. Living in a poor neighborhood, you fight to live. It is an environment that leaves traumatic scars.

I worked as soon as I could. Usually 2-3 jobs just like my mom. Then in 1987 I got into a severe car accident and lived off the settlement for awhile but still worked. Lots of friends suddenly needed loans. I obliged. Eventually the money was gone and the bills piled up and that was when I found exotic dancing. I remember thinking I was going to get my whole family out of the rut; but, that didn’t happen. I wished I had known better and saved or invested; but, I had no financial direction or education.

I was able to help my mom launch her shop that she continued to have for eight years. I bought myself a nice car and was able to pay bills with ease. It felt so good to be able to provide for myself easily; but, I knew dancing could only last so long and my soul was screaming to get out.

In my early thirties I had my baby daughter and wanted to turn my life around. I went back to school to become a veterinarian technician; but, before I could finish my mom was diagnosed with cancer. Then my life became about taking care of her.

Inevitably she passed. I went to work as a vet tech for a short while; but, then had my nervous breakdown three months later. My doctor strongly suggested I go on disability. I was very sick mentally and physically. I agreed and was grateful for the opportunity to heal while worrying less about how to pay the rent. However, that really wasn’t the case. Disability doesn’t pay the bills. I had to apply for any and every assistance there was. Meanwhile my mental and physical health debilitating. Eventually, I was homeless and at the mercy of others. My pride and self worth gone.

For years now, I’ve worked hard in therapy to heal and be able to function again. These last few years I’ve made great strides with working a temporary job and graduating from the herbal apprenticeship. Now what? I am planning on starting a little Etsy shop with my daughter and thinking about trying the ticket to work program again through Social Security. I have to be careful with my choices to ensure my survival. When I worked the temporary job for peanuts. My health insurance went. I don’t know yet how having a shop online will affect my insurance, my housing, etc., It’s really like being between a rock and a hard place.

I am determined to get off this system; but, struggling with all those feelings of self doubt, like I am not good enough and never going to be able to succeed. The recent loss of my car seems to confirm that I will always be struggling. I can’t afford basic needs. How will I ever be able to start a shop? Or make enough to cover what assistance does now?

It’s a perpetual problem and the battle never seems to end. It gets me terribly depressed at times. I even suspect the government would prefer we all just jump off a bridge to ease the financial crisis. That is when I have to remind myself that I am grateful for the roof over my head. I have faith that my future is bright. The law of attraction says I must set free the doubt. I have to feel worthy of success. I turn to my blog to write and set free the shame I’ve held onto since a child. When people used to look at me disgusted. If they looked at me at all.

Nobody wants to acknowledge the homeless, the mentally ill, the unfortunate. People pay attention only after a poor person out of desperation has committed a crime or attempted suicide, and even then the attention is fleeting and superficial.

If awareness was higher and we all practiced kindness, maybe the struggle would lessen. I wonder if when I was in junior high school, if just one person reached out to me, then maybe my life would have turned out differently. Maybe I would have stayed in school or found some self worth.

For along time I was angry and envious of rich people; but, then realized it only added to the segregation. I don’t know what it’s like for rich people. The few I’ve known don’t have any higher self worth than I do. Their value is usually distorted and lies in ego and how much they own. They are expected to succeed no matter what and it is expected for poor people to fail. The separation just keeps getting bigger.

If rich people showed more compassion and poor people stopped isolating themselves, maybe we could meet in the middle. We need to stop saying we are poor and start believing in our worth. We are rich in ways that have so much to offer. We have to believe and be heard and seen.

Being poor feels like being invisible. I want to change that, not only for myself but for my daughter, my family and for all the people who feel less than.

 

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Rainy Day Healing

rainydayRaindrops on the window

Wild winds blow the tree tops

Candles are lit

Incense perfumes the air

Sitting still, I close my eyes

White light fills me

Third eye goes blind 
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Ego distracts

Spirit pulls me back

Be calm

Listen to the silence

The echoes of the wind

speed up with urgency

Tree branches sway to the turbulence

Dancing with the storm.

Gray skies embrace me with neutrality.  All that was is set free.  All that will be,

is  here and now.  Open my arms to receive the love.  Closing my eyes again

my third eye beams indigo, letting ego go…

Deeply rooted with the trees, I learn their dance.  Cleansed by the rains and wind.

I allow the healing in….

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