Here we are, halfway through January, and I am trying to remind myself that a new year has begun. I started off strong, as most of us do with our resolutions and optimism. My daughter and I had a cozy New Year eve at home, followed by traditional Greek Spanokopita with the lucky quarter, that I finally got! Then we spent the rest of the first week of the year, with a DIY spa day, getting back to the gym, printing weekly planners and getting healthy and organized.
The second week….plummet. My heart got broken from a person I thought was a friend, I fell down the stairs and sprained my ankle, and then I bawled and wailed over my cat whom I am still not sure if he is dying. He wasn’t eating much for four days and less each day. The vet confirmed over the phone that it didn’t sound good and that they stop eating when their organs start shutting down. I have been waking up early and sitting at my altar, praying, smudging, crying. I performed Reiki on him and myself. I am somewhere between acceptance and praying for a miracle. I was intuitively guided to go out and buy some cat food with gravy, and thought that may appeal to him. My hope renewed when he actually began to eat last night. This morning he ate a little and drank some water. I read online that cats can have diseases such as kidney disease and cancer, where it appears they are dying but may live a while longer. I am monitoring him and will call the vet back and chat.🙏🙏🙏
Meanwhile I have been reflecting on how every January it seems there is some major trauma or challenge to over come. Last year it was losing my car, the year before bedbugs. Fortunately, with each battle, my warrior spirit gains wisdom, patience and enlightenment. No matter how challenging or painful, I know that I will come out the other side. Even through these present heartbreaks, I have maintained routine, self care and faith.
This year I will continue to love myself, heal myself and nurture myself. My journey thus far has been tumultuous with glimpses of hope. Healing has been painful with reward. Self love has become a multidimensional task, involving so much more than I anticipated.
I have been the caterpillar, completely dissolving, breaking down and rebuilding itself in it’s cocoon. This year, I hope to love and heal myself enough to at least start to break out of this cocoon and view my life as I am trying to manifest. A life of purpose and serving.
2018 had some intense retrogrades and challenges for all. Lots of purging and shedding old ways, people, etc. This theme continues as what no longer serves, dissolves. I hope that lucky quarter goes into effect for me and that 2019 will be the year prosperity and good health can at least be within reach. So far it has been a rollercoaster, hang on everyone!😁✌